baihe_media | To Embers We Return (焚情) Read Along: Chapters 31-40

In the R&D Department, Li Shan lifts up Li Ruoyuan and explains the tracking device. A staffer, curious about the rumours around Li Ruoyuan's childlike appearance, sneaks a glimpse. Han Fu, leader of the Lijing Bureau, makes a dramatic entrance and shoots corrosive poison from her fingertip into his eye as punishment. A blue light appears on the tracker screen, indicating a zhulong-level abomination. Li Ruoyuan orders Han Fu to go take care of it.
In the market, Shen Ni and Bian Jin (as well as Li Si, joining the fray with a Gatling gun) fight the abomination that used to be a child, observing that it's regenerative abilities are not like the Black Box they fought at the border, which could be defeated by destroying the head and then removing the core or jade disc and tossing it in mercury. Shen Ni suspects there's some kind of brain in there. The abomination says I want a better body, the best body, that body, and points at Bian Jin.

- I am looking So Respectfully at Han Fu. Black metallic mask that does not even show her eyes? Clothes covered in the red spider lily motif? Bright red fingernails that literally drip poison?? She is so cool.

- A child's head merging with an old man's to produce a middle-aged man feels like it should relate to the whole time travel situation somehow. A future that has exhausted itself absorbing a past in order to claim some renewed vitality? Or something? I am no doubt reading too much into this.

- Does Shen Ni's stick make a pew pew sound when she blasts the creature though. These are the important questions.

I am looking So Respectfully at Han Fu
With apologies to Shen Ni, when Han Fu first appeared, I immediately started shipping her and Bian Jin. PLEASE DO NOT KILL ME SHEN NI.

A future that has exhausted itself absorbing a past in order to claim some renewed vitality? Or something? I am no doubt reading too much into this.
I'm pointedly not saying anything.

when Han Fu first appeared, I immediately started shipping her and Bian Jin

I would absolutely read that fic

The child's headless body steals the head of a guard who gets too close. Dou Xuanji tries to intervene, but the 'child' blocks her strike, and asks Dou Xuanji for her body. People flee, seeking refuge in the wealthy houses nearby, all of whom (with the exception of Prince Wei, the emperor's despicable brother) offer shelter. Shen Ni, not wanting to reveal the truth of Bian Jin's repairs, helps lead the other abomination away, while Bian Jin marvels at the capabilities Ni's Heart has unlocked. They effectively drop the abomination on Prince Wei's house, about which Shen Ni is oh so very sorry. After Bian Jin defeats it, Shen Ni notices her hand is bleeding where she was wielding the lightning whip, and realises with irritation that Bian Jin hasn't felt pain normally since Ni's Heart was installed, and simply hadn't told her. Says they can't wait until tomorrow to do a full examination.

- Shen Ni and Bian Jin throwing a monster at Prince Wei's house is so delightfully absurd.

- Love to see Bian Jin testing out the extensive range of her powers! Can't wait to see her up against something that actually challenges her (like, say, a batallion of over 200? Oh wait...)

- There's a passage about how Bian Jin's hands are scarred but beautiful: hands that have slain enemies and protedted her own, hands that raised Shen Ni... and I know we're long past the 'sure hope this doesn't awaken anything in me' point on Shen Ni's part but, well.

- The mention of Bian Jin being a poor liar is interesting. *looks veeeeery closely at those sealed memories*

Shen Ni and Bian Jin throwing a monster at Prince Wei's house is so delightfully absurd.
I loved the extreme basement-dwelling gamerbro loser vibes he had in this scene.

The mention of Bian Jin being a poor liar is interesting. *looks veeeeery closely at those sealed memories*
POINTEDLY NOT SAYING ANYTHING

I loved the extreme basement-dwelling gamerbro loser vibes he had in this scene.

Play stupid games win stupid prizes! *drops a monster on your house*

Dou Xuanji, with Fang Pan backing her up at range, continues to fight the abomination made from the child's body, which becomes metallic and stronger as the fight progresses. As things are looking very bad for Dou Xuanji, we get brief backstory of Dou Xuanji being saved from decapitation by the head of the Lijing Bureau. Then Li Si arrives with a hail of bullets, carries Dou Xuanji to safety, and the two of them engage in some bickering that certainly should not be mistaken for flirtation.

Han Fu shows up and calmly walks towards the abomination, letting it ensnare her, but when nothing happens she introduces herself as the only fighter in court with an unaltered body, then shoots poison from her fingers until it dissolves, leaving only a metal core. We get some background as to the cultivation and costs of her poison technique that involves no cybernetics, as well as how people with no cybernetic alterations are and have been regarded (not well).

Shen Ni and Bian Jin return to Shen Ni's workroom, where she cuts open the abomination they fought and finds another metal core, but sets it aside for now, figuring she can 'copy Li Shan's homework' later, once Li Shan has studied the other one that the Lijing Bureau will surely hand over. Because the priority right now is examining Bian Jin, which Bian Jin feels some kind of way about. At Shen Ni's touch, Bian Jin is eventually pressed into admitting that she is sensitive to Shen Ni's touch.

- I'm very intriguted as to Dou Xuanji's backstory now.

- The extremely charged bickering between Dou Xuanji and Li Si is like a pint of ice cream and I am eating it up with a spoon.

- Speaking of backstories, I need to know absolutely everything about Han Fu, and how she and Bian Jin know each other, and her poison, and and and. Bian Jin is a weapon; Han Fu is a poison, and does either of htem get to be a person? And the whole 'character seeing themself as toxic and so unable to let anyone get close' thing is fun enough when used metaphorically but I am so into it being used literally here. I want a whole novel about her.

- That workshop scene, huh? I particularly liked the line where in this moment, Bian Jin's physical state was a higher priority [to Shen Ni] than the entire world. Or, perhaps not just in this moment. We're getting some good relationship development here. Though I also enjoyed Bian Jin being at a loss for words as to how to even begin to explain what happens to her at Shen Ni's touch.

The extremely charged bickering between Dou Xuanji and Li Si is like a pint of ice cream and I am eating it up with a spoon.
I love their dynamic so much.

I want a whole novel about her.
PLEASE NING YUAN

Though I also enjoyed Bian Jin being at a loss for words as to how to even begin to explain what happens to her at Shen Ni's touch.
I'm translating the Bian Jin's First Close Encounter with Sex Toys bit now and it's so fun.

Bian Jin tells Shen Ni in more detail about her touch sensitivity, cuts off Shen Ni's explanation that Ni's Heart wasn't quite ready, and says the benefits are worth it, and Shen Ni has been good to her. Shen Ni has feelings about this. Shen Ni explains that in working with the metal from the Lili crater she discovered her blood contains rare anti-radiation enzymes, so she used this to neutralise the radiation in the metal for Ni's Heart, hence the resonance. Offers to swap it out for a different core whilst she fixes Ni's Heart; Bian Jin refuses, in an exchange that contains many undercurrents of flirtation, fondness, and feelings. Shen Ni says she'll need to do some examination and adjustment if she's going to fix Ni's Heart whilst it's still in Bian Jin's body, and Bian Jin figures she can't really refuse, as this is Shen Ni's life's work. Shen Ni uses her palm scanner to examine Bian Jin's face and neck without technically touching her, but that doesn't do much to prevent Bian Jin's sensitivity readings from soaring way higher than the levels in Shen Ni's reference data, and when Shen Ni looks at Bian Jin's face, Bian Jin is the picture of horny (or, in Shen Ni's eyes, entrancing). Shen Ni, now rather hot and bothered herself, recalls Bian Jin's reaction to having the poison sucked out of the wounds on her hand, and wonders what the sensitivity readings would be if Bian Jin did have sex.

Well that sure was a scene.

I honestly don't even have much to say about this one except that once again Ning Yuan is very good at writing these incredibly charged scenes and I wonder how much longer these two are going to torment themselves like this.

Also I both enjoyed and had a bit of a giggle at the almost literal 'I want to study her under a microscope' of the line There was something uniquely compelling, even entrancing about Bian Jin; cold as snow, the more she held you at a distance, the more you wanted to hold her in the palm of your hand and look more closely.

And I have so many questions about the reference data and what kind of ethical review was involved.

once again Ning Yuan is very good at writing these incredibly charged scenes
She is SO GOOD honestly Anglo fandom/profic writers could learn so much from her.

Also I both enjoyed and had a bit of a giggle at the almost literal 'I want to study her under a microscope' of the line
Someone in the novel's comments said something about 'Bian Jin is the code and Shen Ni is the codebreaker' and that is not unfair.

And I have so many questions about the reference data and what kind of ethical review was involved.
As do I! Like what did the ethics approval form even LOOK like.

Shen Ni accidentally brushes Bian Jin's right hand and through a sequence of reactions the two of them end up in a highly compromising position with Bian Jin's thighs around Shen Ni's waist. Shen Ni strokes Bian Jin's back to help her relax and claims it's a process of desensitisation. Even without Ni's Heart this kind of touch is foreign to Bian Jin, weapon that she is. She asks if there are other methods of desensitisation; she doesn't want to be put in this state by the touch of someone she has looked after as a little sister. Meanwhile Shen Ni is remembering how Bian Jin rejected her all those years ago, but now she's treating her with such love and care, and, er, rubbing her thighs against her. Shen Ni throws her arms around Bian Jin and leans in but just as they're about to kiss, Bian Jin turns aside and says if we do this how will we divorce in 2 years? Shen Ni almost responds with 'let's just not divorce, then' but feels that would sound childish, and knows Bian Jin isn't the sort to lightly take up with someone she raised as a child. Bian Jin pulls away and Shen Ni eventually lets her, then tries for some degree of professionalism and says they can make some adjustments and keep up the schedule of regular examinations. Shen Ni doesn't really want to fix Bian Jin's sensitivity to her touch but gets to work, ignoring her dry eyes and the ache in her back from the fight earlier. Finally she calls Bian Jin over to test the readings again, but there's no significant improvement. Seeing Shen Ni rubbing her dry eyes Bian Jin says let's call it there for now. Shen Ni obediently agrees, enjoying the feeling of being looked after by her shijie, and says my back hurts as well, can you have a look?

- Shen Ni constantly wondering what would happen to the sensitivity readings if they were to kiss or go Even Further: Shijie we have to have sex it's for science.

- Like, I would say get a room you two, but they already have one and you're just decorating it with condom wrappers rather than actually making any use of it so.

- I have some not-fully-articulated thoughts about how the very concept of touch is used here, and how it's elevated (literally and figuratively) beyond just the usual, and how that not only serves to complement Ning Yuan's ability to write highly charged scenes in which very little physically actually happens, but also plays against the weaponisation themes by turning the dial up on a kind of sensation a weapon would have no reason to feel and thus no defences against...

- I also really like how along with leaning into the guilt/discomfort of a shizun romance from Bian Jin's side of things, we also see Shen Ni's understanding of that discomfort. I feel like it would be very easy to flatten her character by having her just sulking that Bian Jin only sees her as a little sister and I like how instead she's you get a reinforcement of her understanding of Bian Jin and her ability to read people in general, in a way that also adds a level of maturity that I appreciate.

- But also good lord girl can sajiao.

I feel like it would be very easy to flatten her character by having her just sulking that Bian Jin only sees her as a little sister and I like how instead she's you get a reinforcement of her understanding of Bian Jin and her ability to read people in general, in a way that also adds a level of maturity that I appreciate.

This is why I really appreciate Shen Ni as a character, because I feel so many younger protagonists fall into the trap of being mostly a Standard Ingenue. She's complex and scheming and really savvy not just about tech stuff but also about people, and the text really shows us that.

But also good lord girl can sajiao.
Word.

Shen Ni holds her plushie and tells Bian Jin she can wear gloves; left with no excuse, Bian Jin examines Shen Ni's back whilst introspecting about their relationship and their past. Tells Shen Ni to take off her clothes so Bian Jin can get a better look; Shen Ni panics and pretends to answer a call. Bian Jin sees through the ruse but eventually leaves. Shen Ni contemplates the effects of Ni's Heart, and is interrupted by a ping from the spybird she sent to Xuanzhou, then calls for snacks as she watches the projection of bounty hunters fleeing from broken bodies crawling out of graves. The spybird is struck down and a strange woman approaches, holding what seems very much like a whip. She picks up the bird and Shen Ni sees her face(lesness), before the bird is crushed and the signal drops.

Shen Ni checks the screen with the reconstruction and analysis of 'Qin Wushang', which showed human tissue but lots of nanotech and a biological reagent that is useful in cybernetics and the regeneration of the city's defenses but dangerous in large quantities and can lead to madness and death. She knows this isn't the real Qin Wushang, and may not even be human; she also intuitively feels that this 'Qin Wushang' is connected to the woman who smashed her spybird.

Meanwhile Bian Jin lies down in their bedroom but finds herself replaying that moment with Shen Ni and opens her eyes. We get a highkey mysterious passage about how Bian Jin will leave Chang'an when the time comes, how someone has a lock on her body and soul, and Chang'an was only ever a dream. She logs into the darkweb and sees the post Shen Ni made about a reward for Bian Jin's whip (and Qin Wushang's head), along with a reply just a few hours ago from Qin Wushang promising more 'gifts', as if to emphasise that she's still alive.

When Shen Ni comes in, Bian Jin tells her not to concern herself with the bone whip. Shen Ni says but it was left to you by your beloved shizun. Bian Jin asks about the jade disc her shizun made, and Shen Ni swears she kept it (setting a mental reminder to dig it out of the bin). Bian Jin sees through her and blames nominative determinism. Shen Ni says her back still hurts, asks to lean on Bian Jin whilst she sleeps, and the two end up in an embrace ('It doesn't hurt, like this') and fall asleep. A dream, awaiting the awakening.

- Shen Ni when will you learn not to start games you aren't willing to finish XD There's a line about how Shen Ni was the one to first suggest their eventual divorce, and now the very stones she tossed in the air are falling on her own head, and honestly that pretty much describes Shen Ni. So clever that most of her problems are entirely of her own making. Love that for her.

- Someone save this poor plushie

- I have to laugh at how Bian Jin can see through Shen Ni's tricks but can't quite manage to see just how desperately Shen Ni wants in her pants.

- Shen Ni calling to the kitchens for ~~popcorn~~ snacks whilst she watches the bounty hunters via spybird livestream is absolutely iconic.

- a highkey mysterious passage about how Bian Jin will leave Chang'an when the time comes, how someone has a lock on her body and soul, and Chang'an was only ever a dream WHAT! DOES! THIS! MEAN!?!?!?!??! WHAT IS IN YOUR HEAD BIAN JIN?

- I see you there, second narrative mention of a top-tier machinist who disappeared several years ago. I see you. (Absolutely wild guess: a time-traveller?)

- I absolutely lost it at 沈乖乖/Shen Guaiguai. Also I so badly want to see Bian Jin actually call her that at some point because I think it would short-circuit Shen Ni's brain.

Someone save this poor plushie
Worse things happen to the plushie if you can believe it (it was the Black Box all along! Just joking... or am I).

Shen Ni calling to the kitchens for popcorn snacks whilst she watches the bounty hunters via spybird livestream is absolutely iconic.
I absolutely love this and love it becoming a running theme. All Shen Ni has ever wanted is to hang out with shijie, munch on snacks and dabble in non-urgent projects. Instead.

I absolutely lost it at 沈乖乖/Shen Guaiguai. Also I so badly want to see Bian Jin actually call her that at some point because I think it would short-circuit Shen Ni's brain.
POINTEDLY NOT SAYING ANYTHING (but also omg Ning Yuan your callback abilities are LEGEND).

it was the Black Box all along
The 黄雀 lurking behind!

All Shen Ni has ever wanted is to hang out with shijie, munch on snacks and dabble in non-urgent projects
And occasionally be a Horrible ~~Goose~~ Fox just for fun! Stop making her go to court!

Fang Pan carries a gravely injured Dou Xuanji to the imperial hospital, who deny entry on the grounds of being busy (but more likely on the grounds of Dou Xuanji and Han Fu were involved in an investion of the former head of the hospital). Li Si hears the commotion and comes to watch. Han Fu arrives and treats Dou Xuanji herself wit just a does of strong nutrient broth, and comments dismissively on her weakness. Li Si steps in and defends Dou Xuanji. Han Fu walks away and Fang Pan says to Li Si thanks for that but if you value your life don't antagonise her. Li Si has some feelings about Dou Xuanji's absolute loyalty towards someone who doesn't seem to are about her, and says you really are a pitiful little dog.

Shen Ni doesn't wake to her alarm. She's been hugging Bian Jin all night, the poor plushie forgotten entirely. Bian Jin (who hasn't slept well, for reasons of Shen Ni hugging her) wakes Shen Ni and says there's a cout meeting to discuss Black Box. Shen Ni doesn't want to go, especially when she thinks how furiou it will make Prince Wei if she doesn't show up. Puts on a grand performance of a stomachache, and Bian Jin takes her lead, saying maybe you were poisoned, and angrily promising to investigate. They'll take this opportunity to 'clean up the house'.

Shen Ni sends her excuses to Li Ruoyuan, and Bian Jin asks but what about copying Li Shan's homework? Shen Ni says Li Shan may not get the right answers; best do it myself. They retrieve the metal core they had cut out of the abomination last night, and Bian Jin breaks it open to reveal a tiny black brain sending out feelers.

- What is Han Fu's deal??? Other than stealing every scene she's in, I mean. I know we got a bit of her backstory but not nearly enough and I am so extremely normal about her.

- Li Si is also very cool, she just suffers a little from being in the same scenes as Han Fu, which really is not her fault. But her total irreverence towards everyone is delightful.

- Also, how many times has she called Dou Xuanji a dog now? Once is an insult, twice is a grudge, but three times? That's just a kink.

- The image of Bian Jin counting Shen Ni's hairs to keep her thoughts away from Anything Else is hilarious to me.

- *zombie voice* braaaaaaiiiiiiiiins

Bian Jin (who hasn't slept well, for reasons of Shen Ni hugging her)
Poor Bian Jin, doomed to insomnia by reason of Too Horny for Wife.

Li Si is also very cool
I so badly want art of her with the sunglasses and the lollipop and the Gatling gun. But I have to get there in the translation first.

Also, how many times has she called Dou Xuanji a dog now? Once is an insult, twice is a grudge, but three times? That's just a kink.
It's also quite funny though because I feel Li Si has stronger puppy vibes than Dou Xuanji.

I so badly want art of her with the sunglasses and the lollipop and the Gatling gun
The lollipop took me out. She is so delightfully weird.

(if you see about ten million typos in this no you don't, my keyboard was sticking more than I realised until it was too late)

Shen Ni and Bian Jin discuss the implications of and possible reasons behind Black Box evolving intelligence and a brain, and how soon it may be difficult to tell who is human and who is Black Box. Shen Ni wonders aloud why Liu Ji was so much weaker than the abominations they just fought, watching Bian Jin's expression closely as Bian Jin unfeignedly says maybe his was an older or a different version of the virus? Shen Ni thinks but if Liu Ji really has nothing to do with Bian Jin, then who was the mysterious person who saved the Liu family? She can't think of anyone else with the capability, and she instinctively felt that the blurred figure in the wanted poster was Bian Jin.

Bian Jin sets off for work, and Shen Ni definitely does not sulk about how she skipped court to stay home but now Bian Jin won't even be here to keep her company.

Li Shan is terrified by her own discovery of Black Box's brain, and is afraid of Li Ruoyuan's disappointment if the tracking system fails to work on this variant. Reluctantly, she admits to herself that their only hope of defeating it is Shen Ni; she sent a message to Shen Ni asking for help updating the trackers and Shen Ni agreed with an excess of humility.

At court, Prince Wei (the emperor's despicable brother) tries to play on Li Shan's grievances with Shen Ni to get her on his side against her. We get a bit about how all seven princes are wary of Shen Ni, Li Ruoyuan's 'whetstone' (and how Shen Ni herself tries to avoid this role to some extent). Li Shan scoffs, says don't drag me into this, and accuses him of being Cao Su's pawn, which infuriates Prince Wei for several reasons, not least of which being it's true. He makes an exceedingly rude comment and she slaps him.

Back at home, a bored Shen Ni decides to look up the two hoodlums who kept her from getting her snowglobe on the night of Shangyuan, and greatly enjoys watching the surveillance footage of her shijie wiping the floor with them.

- 'Soon, there may be no way to tell from the outside who is an ordinary person and who is Black Box' oh we're DOING THIS! Not only do I enjoy this particular flavour of horror in and of itself but I'm also very keen to see how this story chooses to play it alongside the weaponisation themes, as we expand this question of what it means to be a person.

- Was there really no connection between Liu Ji and Bian Jin? But if that were the case, then who was the mysterious person who came to the Liu family's rescue? GOOD! QUESTION! I am increasingly convinced that Bian Jin's mind is not always entirely... well I was about to say 'her own' but I don't even know if that's the right way to frame it. Anyway. Between this and the ease with which Shen Ni can read her and know that her confusion is genuine (and previous mentions of Bian Jin being a poor liar) this feels so much like a 'she has some task she must carry out but isn't good enough at deception to do it without being caught, so the only way is to lock the knowledge of it away even from herself' situation. Either that or someone else is using her to carry out their aims and has locked it away for the same reason. So which is it and what is the secret task and why does it require getting Shen Ni access to the time capsule???

- I like that Shen Ni's obsession with Bian Jin does not prevent her from suspecting her. And also that there appears to be absolutely no cognitive dissonance there whatsoever. It's a fun brand of subtly unhinged.

- So Bian Jin is/was the Blade of the Empire, and now Shen Ni is the Emperor's whetstone (and Han Fu her poison)... we've got the makings of a fine toolbox here.

- I hate to agree with Li Chu on anything but I am on record as being fond of a Shen Ni/Li Shan bad-idea ship so...

- Li Shan absolutely obliterating him was such a delight to watch though. Love seeing her use her bad attitude for good.

- A bored Shen Ni never bodes well for anyone; RIP those two guys.

- She couldn't keep her heart from racing as she watched Bian Jin send the two flying with a kick. It was always breathtaking to watch her shijie beat people up. She also felt a trace of resentment; come to think of it, it had been a long time since shijie had punished her... SHEN NI. Control yourself. Or, you know, don't.

Shen Ni agreed with an excess of humility
As she always does.

and greatly enjoys watching the surveillance footage of her shijie wiping the floor with them
Me @ Shen Ni: is this porn?? Are you watching porn when you should be at court??

I like that Shen Ni's obsession with Bian Jin does not prevent her from suspecting her. And also that there appears to be absolutely no cognitive dissonance there whatsoever. It's a fun brand of subtly unhinged.
I really like this, and the fact that it doesn't change the core of her feelings for Bian Jin a single iota.

a Shen Ni/Li Shan bad-idea ship
I would read this AU. They would be SO BAD for each other.

Li Shan absolutely obliterating him was such a delight to watch though
I love watching Li Chu get trodden lower and lower into the ground at every turn.

it had been a long time since shijie had punished her... SHEN NI. Control yourself. Or, you know, don't.
When a punishment is basically a reward.

is this porn?? Are you watching porn when you should be at court??
This is particularly funny contrasted with Bian Jin watching porn For Science a little while later.

They would be SO BAD for each other
Right?? It would be such a disaster. I need 150k words of it.

I love watching Li Chu get trodden lower and lower into the ground at every turn.
I keep picturing him as another mechanical-eyed scenery-chewing villain from a very tropey drama and it works almost too perfectly. Which is to say, same.

Li Si examines the bodies of the fallen Ruifeng Batallion, all killed by a sword through the throat; she can think of only one person who could conceivably have done this. In court, Prince Wei makes his accusations of negligence against the absent Shen Ni, whilst Li Shan watches with disdain. Li Ruoyuan is not pleased at her despicable brother pettily pursuing personal grudges at this point in time, and he blunders into a criticism of the Emperor herself, which wins him an exile to Lanling. He looks to Cao Su for help but gets nothing; his faction has effectively abandoned him.

Bian Jin makes her way to work via public transit, on which she is something of an anomaly. Looking out at the worn-down buildings and broken signs, it occurs to her that her home has grown old. She overhears two women talking about someone who was in a coma but whose wife used the connection forged by the couples' module to visit her dreams each night - but with things as they are right now, maybe it would have been better not to wake? Then she spots a flower growing in the pavement, and muses about how life instinctively fights to survive; how this flower will struggle on, uncaring about the affairs of the world, even when no one but Bian Jin will so much as notice it.

It's quiet at work, as most people have called off out of fear etc due to the news around Black Box. Bian Jin scrolls through social media and sees many positive comments about her and Shen Ni as a couple but some that accuse her of treason or pity Shen Ni for having to associate with her. She heads towards the archives, thinking about the couples' module and how all that's holding her back from it is that one dream...

The next thing Bian Jin knows, she's pressing Shen Ni to one of the archive's shelves, Shen Ni's clothing dishevelled and red marks at her neck as she looks at Bian Jin with some confusion. The door opens and Bian Jin pulls Shen Ni to her and covers her mouth, trying to hide them; Shen Ni puts up no resistance.

- Bian Jin pausing to appreciate the little flower that lives out its life ignorant of the affairs of the world, surviving because that is life's instinct no matter that most would think it an empty pursuit for something of no intelligence, uncaring that no one but Bian Jin will even notice... it doesn't feel particularly subtle but just like that little flower, I do not care! I love stuff like this, from a character who is seen by most (including herself) as a weapon, as in some ways even less of a living being than that flower. Love seeing a weapon kneel before the beauty of the life she defends, down to the smallest little flower. (It actually reminds me of a quote from another novel, from a different living-weapon character, who has a thought along the lines of his only wish before he died was to see the blooming of the flowers he had spent his life's blood to water). I'm also intrigued by what feels like perhaps an ongoing thread of life-amidst-decay, or the contrast of fading grandeur and new life. And by the way the emphasis on this little flower's life even though it lacks sentience and thus (in the eyes of most) importance, vs Black Box evolving sentience and becoming harder to distinguish from 'real' life, and how all of this combines.

- The last bit of this chapter!!! I knew she was losing time!!! I knew it!!!!!!!!! What is going on and who is in her head with her and what was she looking for on those shelves and and and!!!

Edited (wrong chapter post) 2024-12-28 15:08 (UTC)

it doesn't feel particularly subtle but just like that little flower, I do not care!
I feel like this is very much Ning Yuan's own vibe.

Shen Ni in the last part of the chapter, probably: I am extremely turned on.

The one who opened the door is just Meng Chu; waiting for her to finish her work, Bian Jin has to deal with a Shen Ni in her lap, eventually grabbing on to her and telling her to stop moving around. Neither of them is unaffected by the extended proximity. When Meng Chu leaves, Bian Jin pulls Shen Ni into the breakroom, and there is some byplay around offering Shen Ni medicine for the marks on her neck before Shen Ni explains that she was bored at home and snuck out to check on Bian Jin, finding her in the archives apparently searching for something, before Bian Jin noticed her and grabbed for her throat. Bian Jin admits she was effectively blacked out for this whole episode, and asks what she had been looking for; Shen Ni says she was searching the shelves labelled '11th year of Wude'. We get some historical context via Bian Jin: that was the year of a major snowstorm, and also the year the 7-year-old then-princess Li Ruoyuan came down wiht a strange illness.

Bian Jin thinks her blackout could be related to the issues with her memory and asks Shen Ni to have a go at repairing her memory module. Shen Ni takes out the tool she recently installed in her arm and gets to work, but it's no good: the missing 3 years remain inaccessible even though Bian Jin insists she's taken down her firewalls. Shen Ni says someone with an even greater technical gift than hers must have locked the memories.

She coughs, Bian Jin goes to get her a cup of water but doesn't return, and when Shen Ni goes looking for her she hears a woman screaming at Bian Jin for being heartless.

- It's surely no coincidence that she was searching the shelves corresponding to the year Li Ruoyuan fell ill, and if this is the illness that keeps her looking like a child well into adulthood, could it possibly have to do with time travel? Something reaching through, or perhaps Li Ruoyuan herself being of a different time, or some kind of weird possession-by-future or...? And I'm also looking closely at that mention of a major snowstorm, for no reason than Shen Ni's obsession with snowglobes and the way she was a foundling with no clear background but I don't think the timeline works for this to be the year she turned up, does it? (Oh man are they both time-travel babies? Or something???) Murder board time!

- And who has greater technical capabilities than Shen Ni? Qin Wushang? The mysterious person we've had two mentions of, who disappeared some years ago? It can't possibly be Shen Ni herself, can it?

- I was also pleasantly surprised when Bian Jin just told Shen Ni everything; I was preparing myself for several chapters at least of her trying to hide the gaps in her memory or otherwise keep things from Shen Ni, and it's refreshing to instead get them immediately working on the problem together.

Edited (and another thing) 2024-12-29 11:55 (UTC)

All the Li Ruoyuan business is extremely murderboard-y.

It can't possibly be Shen Ni herself, can it?
I mean.... given our theories about Bian Jin, which I'm neither confirming nor denying, it's not impossible. Is it?

I was also pleasantly surprised when Bian Jin just told Shen Ni everything
I feel like this happens quite a bit, on both sides. Which makes for a nice change from the usual tropes!

To Embers We Return (焚情) Read Along: Chapters 31-40

Chapter 31

Re: Chapter 31

Re: Chapter 31

Re: Chapter 31

Chapter 32

Re: Chapter 32

Re: Chapter 32

Re: Chapter 32

Chapter 33

Re: Chapter 33

Re: Chapter 33

Chapter 34

Re: Chapter 34

Re: Chapter 34

Chapter 35

Re: Chapter 35

Re: Chapter 35

Chapter 36

Re: Chapter 36

Re: Chapter 36

Re: Chapter 36

Chapter 37

Re: Chapter 37

Re: Chapter 37

Re: Chapter 37

Re: Chapter 37

Chapter 38

Re: Chapter 38

Re: Chapter 38

Re: Chapter 38

Chapter 39

Re: Chapter 39

Re: Chapter 39

Chapter 40

Re: Chapter 40

Re: Chapter 40